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Teddy: Normally Abnormal"To forget a friend is sad. Not everyone has had a friend. And if I do forget him, I might become like those grown-ups who no longer care for anything except figures." Antoine de Saint-Exupery |
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fatenwrote:
mak.. link me ya
 http://freakinevrythng.blogspot.com/
Mar. 19
Li Vernwrote:
mak mak.. link me.. http://connection-without-ending.blogspot.com..
Dec. 5
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7/3/2009 Leaving for there again.I'm going to be missing from home for a few days. I'd have to say, I can't wait to see the beach! Yay! I think I should move and live there one day. But I won't appreciate it anymore if I do. Ignore me. I'm being dumb. 7/2/2009 Alien = Me?I've been talking a lot everyday and everyday, people just look at me as though I was talking some foreign language... Am I weird? But when I asked them whether they get what I'm saying, some will say they do. Majority would say that they don't get what I'm saying. I think my brain wave works at a different wavelength... It's either I'm too smart for them or I'm too dumb for them... Which is it I wonder... Forgive and forget?It's funny. I don't remember anyone complaining about me when I was Yu Ling's adopted last year. I guess I really do have short term memory. I sorry I missed all the fun in the prefects' room today. *sigh* If only I were there, I would have helped in making matters worst. *evil laugh* That's the only thing I'm good at isn't it? *sinister laughter* But luckily, so far I haven't had much to complain about other than the fact that the other plan co. members doesn't come to fulfil their part. However, I'm never the type to complain, neither am I the type to beg. When I asked for something to be done, if it isn't completed, I remind the person. Afterwhich, if that person still doesn't do it, I'd finish it by myself. What's the point of continously asking when I already know that the help that I asked for will never reach? Furthermore, I'm the forgetting type. I don't forgive a person. If you make me angry, better don't remind or trigger me in any ways or I'd be mad. I'm a really simple person. Really. *smiles* Now I hope that everything will work out well. Everyone in the prefectorial board should sort out all their hard feelings. Hopefully. 7/1/2009 Between Love and Goodbye I watched this movie about a month ago. I've been wanting to blog about it but never actually came to it until now. =D Between Love and Goodbye, is a story that revolves around this gay couple. Really really sad, in my opinion. The movie was about this American guy and a French guy being together. The French guy married their friend which is a lesbian so that he can be a US citizen so that he could be together with the American guy. Then trouble brews when the American guy's sister? came back into their life. *sobs* An artsy movie with happy moments, hope, sadness and I truly enjoyed watching it. Starred by mostly beginner actors. I like some of the songs in the movie too. I don't really like the ending though. Anyway, I don't usually recommend things, so in my opinion it really is a nice movie. Though there are a few explicit scenes but there was nothing too graphical. Go watch it! Everything comes to an end at a certain time in life. Everyone has gotten their adopted. I got mine, which was Wenjing but she was taken away after I properly "groomed" her due to certain reasons. No. It wasn't her fault. She had been doing a rather good job for these short few days. At least there wasn't any complaints about her. Now, I've gotten a new adopted and she(Ann Nie) is going to be going around with me starting from later. Sigh... I'll have to teach her everything I know from top to toe. I don't like repeating myself. Though it is to a different person, I still don't really like it. I'm feeling so lazy... Tired and hazy. P.s~ I can't wait to step-down! I found out the date. But it's not in my place tell. =D 6/25/2009 Who I am; an average extraordinary person. My life has generally been an easy one. I was born into an average family. Average size. Average income. Average education. Average anything-that-you-can-think-of. I think because of all these average things, I've grown up to be an average teenager. Albeit a slight bit twisted at times due to certain reasons but I'm actually quite a normal abnormal teenager. Life in school has been hard ever since I continued my form 6 education in CBN. Everyone is expecting everything from anyone that is labeled a CBN-er. I have to say, it is true that CBN girls are really good at completing whatever obstacle thrown at them. Afterall, all CBN-ers are expected to be; Extraordinary people. They're supposed to be intelligent. They have to be studious. They're always beautiful. They're gentle, kind and polite. Active in extra-extra co-curricular activities. Neat and tidy at all times. Possess leadership qualities which not everyone has. Independent. Dependable. Trustworthy. Etc. Etc. I only want to say that, it is true that we are able to achieve those things if we were pushed to do it. Anyone is able to make it if they set their mind to a goal and really go for it with the right encouragement from people. In my opinion, by giving the wrong form of encouragement (forcing an ideal/perception *look at what CBN girls are supposed to be like*) on another person is a very cruel thing to do. Not everyone can handle the stress that responsibility brings. Some make it to the top and the rest will break. To those that made it to the top, congratulations. Continue with your good work. To those that still hasn't made it, keep on trying. Take a break if you need. Gather your forces(family & friends, supporters). You'll need them. Trust me. To those that broke down, too bad. Life's a b*tch and then you die. If you give up on it, then it's goodbye to you. When you fail, you're supposed to try again and again until you get it right. The choice is in your hands. An average human being or an extraordinary high achiever? 6/14/2009 Stop and Listen If only things would have been easier for me. I know some people would be put off by the first sentence. Those that continued to read. Thank you. I don't hope for things to be easier. I hope I could be stronger. But... Sometimes, all I need is just an attentive ear. Put away all those prejudice, the picture you painted of me. The judgment you have of me even before I open my heart to speak out. There are times that I really needed a helping hand but refused, because of the image people had of me. I don't want to change that image if it's good because I might not be good forever. Let them keep a good image of me as long as they can. If it was a bad image that people have of me, I don't want to go near them because their insincerity in helping will only hurt me further. It's not easy to speak from my heart. It might be easy to some other people but it's extremely hard for me. I've never been the type to express myself - honestly. Feelings that come out as words directly from the bottom of my heart is rare. Everything that comes from the heart, is processed by my brain before they come out from my mouth. Things that I want to tell and yet I don't want anyone to know will be sealed away before it reaches the light of the day. Some people know of this weakness (or is it a strong point?) of mine and they will only entertain me if what I'm about to say will make them happy. Unknowingly scraping my heart because what was given out by me was not reciprocated. This time I'm writing, not a plea to ask people to listen to me. I am writing, hoping that you would pay more attention to the people around you. I am hoping that more people would realize that there are people in this world like me that needs people to listen to them. Perhaps it is time for you to break the wall of graffiti you had of the person, listen to them and let them paint a beautiful painting on a white canvas for you. Really listen to them like. Maybe you'd realize that half of the people you think is bad is not bad after all. Though there are some that really is bad even after listening to their part of the story. Then you can tell yourself that, I have no regrets of ignoring this person. Everyone is different. If only you try to understand what is so different by first beginning to listen to their inner cries, you will find the world a better place. Thank you for reading this ... not a purposeless entry. But more of a random entry. Like all the usual blog entries I write. =D 6/11/2009 Shame? No. It's Pity. I found out about this in the wee early hours in the morning of the 8th... It's a really troublesome news to me... I know I shouldn't have worried... But I did. I'm going to be an <fill in the blanks 1> soon. Happy? Sad? It weighs more to being sad than being happy to know of this news. The truth is... I'm supposed to be rejoicing when I've heard of this news but I just couldn't get myself to. It's not a shame to me. But more of a pity to <fill in the blanks 2>. Since <fill in the blanks 2> won't be in good hands, why even bother to <fill in the blanks 3>? All I can think of now is how much <fill in the blanks 2> is going to be a waste of money and natural resources. And going to be a <fill in the blanks 4> to my already very hard at work parents. The <fill in the blanks 2> is not even supposed to be a <fill in the blanks 4> to my parents! The <fill in the blanks 2>'s <fill in the blanks 5> are supposed to be the ones on <fill in the blanks 4>. *breathes in* *breathes out* Sigh... Hopefully <fill in the blanks 2> won't turn out to be like <fill in the blanks 5>... I hope I had judged the <fill in the blanks 5> wrongly. As they said, never judge a book by it's cover. I hope <fill in the blanks 5> would turn over a new leaf. Sigh... BUT.... Some people are just too dumb for their own good. Buck up would you?! Be independent for once! Earn your own living! To feed yourself! To feed your potato with the tuber already growing, that's just lying there at home! Be mature! It's for your own good! If you can't, fry your brains for all I care! I know you can't get it done overnight but GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You're freaking 30+. 30+! 30plus!!! You had plenty of time! Aren't you ashamed of yourself?! THANK YOU FOR BEING SO RIDICULOUSLY DUMB! P.s~ I'm sorry for having so many "<fill in the blanks>"... Those are what the things that are not supposed to be revealed so early to the rest of the world. And some just never revealed at all. But I can't stand it... Something must be expressed somewhere to ease the burden in my heart. P.s 2~ Thank you for ignoring this post. 5/29/2009 Be patient Sorry. Was too tired when I came back. So I slept. Going out for dinner now. Will come back to upload pictures and blog about today~!!! =D 5/26/2009 She's being taken advantage of... Stop her! I know she has her own free will... Everyone has their own free will and their own choices to be made in life... But... No~!!!!!!!! Save her! Don't let her be fooled! *sigh* The extent of how much a person would do for love amazes me... Why? Because it's a dumb thing. And people continue sacrificing for love despite knowing it's a dumb thing to do. Yup. It's dumb. 5/15/2009 My MUET (Mid year) Speaking topic. Vivian reminded me of something... My MUET Speaking question was; The most important benefit of working overseas for a few years. A: be independent B: expose to a new way of life C: earn more money D: valuable working experience in an international environment Mine was B. And I think overall, my group did pretty badly compared to how we usually do the test... I think I flunked the whole thing. I didn't get a chance to speak because everyone was interrupting me. Maybe because everyone was too nervous... And one of my group member can't seem to say anything... Everything just went wrong... Sigh. What has been done cannot be undone. Surviving School Guess what? I've survived 3 days of mid-year test... I'm dying here. But still alive. Do you know? There's a few really nice teachers that are going the extra mile to help me survive in this cold and merciless world, I'd call school. They're giving me extra lessons to help me pass my papers. Yup. I know I'm sort of in deep sh*t when there's a need for extra lessons after school... Anyway... Thank you very much to those nice teachers. =D I wish you a very Happy Teacher's Day for tomorrow. 5/5/2009 The 3 firsts I had my first ride in the ambulance... I had my first visit to the General Hospital... I watched the routine they choreographed for the teachers day item. =D It's rather nice. 5/3/2009 Long forgotten What do you do when you've come to realise that your friends have forgotten you? Those friends that claimed to never forget you. Those that say you've been there for them through harsh times. Do you approach your friend and shamelessly ask them, "Have you forgotten about me?" Or do you keep quiet and just ignore it, hoping that they were just too busy with their life and that they would come back and give you a hug one day? What would you do? What should I do? 4/25/2009 I am back?Did you realise that I've been gone for quite some time? .... Thanks for those that noticed. Apparently, my cpu was hauled away. Something wrong with it. But I have no idea what's wrong with it... Anyway, I took my MUET today. For my Reading, Writing and Listening paper... All that I can say is that... I have to bid goodbye to my 6. And if on 12th May I don't do well for my Speaking, it's a farewell to my 5... Or maybe my 4 too. Since I consider what I have done to my Reading and Writing paper to be disastrous... People. Thanks for always being here for me. I am really sad now. Shall go and ... think of something to occupy my time so that I won't dwell on it. Let's hope that my MUET will be the best so that I can atleast cover up for the lost marks in the papers that I've sat for today. Love, Teddy. 4/10/2009 Edible Food = Turn on the stove I'm hungry. There isn't any ready-to-eat food at home. Everything edible at home requires turning on the stove... 4/9/2009 My One and Only Impromptu My impromptu was horrible... I sincerely apologise to those that were expecting more from me... But at that moment, I was just frozen from top to toe and from the inside out... I'm really really sorry... *sobs* But I'm really happy to know that you guys actually had faith in me. Thanks a lot. *hugs* 4/7/2009 I’m falling to pieces~I’m really tired. Everything begins from within oneself. Today, while I was helping my parents out at their shop, one of my dad’s friend, came over and I was talking to him. Because my dad was busy working. Then he suddenly asked about my brother. As usual, I’m just hopeless in lying. So, I told him about my brother sticking to the computer all the time and will only not touch the computer when I’m using it. Then, the uncle thinks that he’s a “smart and wise” guy. He began saying things like I should treat my brother better. I should try understanding him more. That I should pay more attention to him. That I should communicate with him. I should act out my role as an older sibling. HELLO?! So, my brother sucks in school, I don’t? I am VERY tired of being the “perfect” sister. Teddy: Pessimistically Optimistic I
changed the title of my blog to Teddy:
Pessimistically Optimistic yesterday. Which is for some reason that
most probably sound like this; I changed my title because I feel like it. I changed the title because, I'm just optimistic. But somehow pessimistic at the same time. I changed it because I am pessimistic about being optimistic... I changed it because I realised that I no longer write about things that I love. Instead, I'm writing about various things in my blog that are categorized under "category-less". I changed it because it is time for change. Hahahaa! Fine. I'll stop. Nothing much could be said when I'm already beginning to crap. Do you know? My messenger is not working. For some reason that is unknown to me. I do not wish to pursue the matter now because my computer is in its haywire mode. I'm still awaiting my technician to come and fix it. Apparently, he said "something" is out of stock, therefore, I can't get it done now... By the way, my most recent favourite song is by 王力宏 (Wang Lee Hom), entitled... 春雨裡洗過的太陽(Chun Yu Li Xi Guo De Tai Yang) ... I found the title in pinyin in Youtube... I can't read chinese... No, I don't call myself a Chinese. I call myself a Malaysian. =D Anyway, I demand YOU to find it in Youtube. I bet you'll fall in love with the song, the rhythm, the music video and of course, him. Wahahhaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *winks* Incase you don't know, I can be counted as a fan of Leehom. I'm a member of his Malaysian based fanclub. Homaniacs. =D Yup. The name's HOMANIACS. But think I'm counted as an inactive member because I have no money for his concerts and also no free time for his showcases. But I really am loyal at heart. =D I'm actually pretty sad that I can't go for his coming concert. Too bad I'm too cautious for my future. I'd prefer to save my money for my future studies than to watch him for a few hours. Just listening to his music is enough for now... Though... I would really really have preferred to go for the concert... But too much excitement is bad for the heart... LOL. But its Leehom... Stop thinking! See? Understand why I changed my blog title now? LOL. 4/5/2009 dots Aw man... Apparently, the main pipe does not affect my row of the block. So, even though my neighbour doesn't have water, I still get water. But I still can't bathe because dad blocked the water from entering my house because of the tap I broke... No bathing~ |
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